Failure-ish... is that even a word? Dang, I even fail at that.
Just kidding, I'm not quite that down on myself today. Maybe tomorrow though....
So I just need to vent. Today I am feeling like a total failure. I am 22 years old, halfway to 23 and I have no college degree (although I do have almost 60 hours of credit), I still live at home with my mom and grandparents and sisters, and I have not one, but two dead end jobs, neither of which I particularly love.... And now I want to cry.
I hate that I'm feeling this way, mostly because of what has brought this on. Last night I received adn e-mail from a friend that I graduated with. He has since graduated from A&M, spent a semester doing missions in Senegal and is getting ready to go through yet another discipleship program before he heads off to be a missionary. This morning I saw on Facebook that one of the girls that I was good friends with in high school had her first baby this week. On Monday, I heard from another of my high school friends who finished his training at CFNI and is living his call as a youth pastor in Kansas. As I type, I'm reminded of my best friend, who loves her job, her husband and her son.
I'm not trying to paint my friends' lives in a rosy light. I know that each one has their struggles. And I'm not saying that I wish that I was where they are. What I am saying is that I wish I was not where I am. Yes, there are certain aspects of my life that I love and am very happy with, but on the whole, I feel like I have nothing to show for my 22.5 years on this planet. I have accomplished nothing that I want to accomplish and if I don't get on the ball, I'm going to look up and I'll be 30 years old, still just barely squeaking by, without a degree, working at a job I couldn't care for less. And that scares me to death.
*sigh*
Happy Wendesday... yeesh.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
A day in the life of a waitress
So. I had a thought the other day. There are tons of reality shows. There are shows about finding love, shows about chasing a dream, shows about being a backstabber... Then I thought about the new movie, that I have not yet seen: Julie & Julia. The plot is a joint story about Julia Childs and a woman who cooks through her cookbook and blogs about it. Then I thought about the fact that I have a blog, but I don't use it very often. Then it came to me: Why hasn't anyone ever decided to do a reality show about the lives of waiters and waitresses? (Or to be more politically correct, servers.) So then I decided that I would begin to blog about some of the exploits I have on the floor of the restaurant I work for. Who knows? Maybe it will be interesting and maybe Lifetime will buy it for a miniseries. And maybe pigs will fly.
Tuesday, July 27, 2009
I showed up to work 30 minutes early, thankful that traffic had not been as bad as I'd thought it would be. My new slip-resistant shoes slid off of my feet with every step that I took and I worried that by the end of my shift, I'd have blisters bigger than Sasquatch. After sitting in my car for 25 minutes, I finally made my way inside the restaurant, to be greeted by no less than 6 of my coworkers gathered around J*, who had fashioned a pair of balls out of bread dough. Charming. I think I rolled my eyes at J, who has been threatening to kiss me "square on the mouth" for my attitude. He has yet to get close, and if he does, I will slap him.
After washing my hands and clocking in, I got to work. I kept greeting people by saying "Good morning!" even though it was after 5:30. So I got laughed at a few times.
At this point, I realize that my dayjob really isn't all that exciting and I really shouldn't bore you with the rest of my shift. But you may take comfort in knowing that my new shoes didn't e=give me blisters. Yay!
*Names changed to protect the somewhat innocent.
Tuesday, July 27, 2009
I showed up to work 30 minutes early, thankful that traffic had not been as bad as I'd thought it would be. My new slip-resistant shoes slid off of my feet with every step that I took and I worried that by the end of my shift, I'd have blisters bigger than Sasquatch. After sitting in my car for 25 minutes, I finally made my way inside the restaurant, to be greeted by no less than 6 of my coworkers gathered around J*, who had fashioned a pair of balls out of bread dough. Charming. I think I rolled my eyes at J, who has been threatening to kiss me "square on the mouth" for my attitude. He has yet to get close, and if he does, I will slap him.
After washing my hands and clocking in, I got to work. I kept greeting people by saying "Good morning!" even though it was after 5:30. So I got laughed at a few times.
At this point, I realize that my dayjob really isn't all that exciting and I really shouldn't bore you with the rest of my shift. But you may take comfort in knowing that my new shoes didn't e=give me blisters. Yay!
*Names changed to protect the somewhat innocent.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
What's in a name?
So. How is everyone? I'm going to guess that since it's been months since I posted, no one is reading this. But hey, I'm going to stick with it, and maybe someday, the world will know my name! Just kidding. I don't really want the world to know my name. Which brings me to my point for this post: names. What does yours mean? Do you know? Do you care? Does it matter at all?
To be quite honest, I'm not sure. I love the concept of names and the meanings behind them. I want to give my children very meaningful names. I think, though, that a name will not have much affect on a child unless he knows what it means. Take me, for example, my name means "nobility." Correct me if I am wrong, but I don't think that I am particularly noble. However, look at Jabez, his name actually was a word meaning "he who brings pain." And everyone knew it! You wanna talk about an inferiority complex?? Goodness gracious. The man is recorded as having prayed that God's hand would be upon him so that he wouldn't cause pain!
I think that meaningful names are a lost art. These days we have celebrities naming their children things like "Apple" and "Lyric" and "Ireland". And you know what? I think that these children just might have some issues with their names. Because these children are named with simple words that they know the meanings of. Unfortunately, these names don't have much substance behind the meaning, but still.
William Shakespeare once wrote, "A rose by any other name still smells as sweet." It appears he would have thought that a name means nothing. And by today's standards... I tend to agree with him, though I really would like to change that for my children... I want to give them names that have deep meaning, and I want them to know it from the moment the names are given to them. Perhaps this is an out-dated and romantic idea... But who cares? :-)
To be quite honest, I'm not sure. I love the concept of names and the meanings behind them. I want to give my children very meaningful names. I think, though, that a name will not have much affect on a child unless he knows what it means. Take me, for example, my name means "nobility." Correct me if I am wrong, but I don't think that I am particularly noble. However, look at Jabez, his name actually was a word meaning "he who brings pain." And everyone knew it! You wanna talk about an inferiority complex?? Goodness gracious. The man is recorded as having prayed that God's hand would be upon him so that he wouldn't cause pain!
I think that meaningful names are a lost art. These days we have celebrities naming their children things like "Apple" and "Lyric" and "Ireland". And you know what? I think that these children just might have some issues with their names. Because these children are named with simple words that they know the meanings of. Unfortunately, these names don't have much substance behind the meaning, but still.
William Shakespeare once wrote, "A rose by any other name still smells as sweet." It appears he would have thought that a name means nothing. And by today's standards... I tend to agree with him, though I really would like to change that for my children... I want to give them names that have deep meaning, and I want them to know it from the moment the names are given to them. Perhaps this is an out-dated and romantic idea... But who cares? :-)
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Rambling......................
Ever hear the Rascal Flatt's song "Too Good Is True"? I've decided it's all a feel-good ruse. :-)
So, it's been a while since I've updated this thing. Between being a college student and waiting tables, I don't have a whole lot of extra time on my hands... Even my Facebook usage has dwindled alarmingly...
Life on this side of Christmas break has slowed... I only have one more paper to write for school, and I've read all but one book that I've been assigned to read. Yay me.
Thanksgiving is fast approaching and bringing with it all the festivity of the holiday season. I saw a sign in someones yard the other day. It said, "Happy Turkey Day!" That irked me, as I'm sure it does every believer who knows that the fourth Thursday in November is about so much more than turkey, green bean casserole and pumpkin pie. As I drove past that sign in my frustrated state of mind, I realized that it had been a while since I'd slowed down to ponder everything that I have to be thankful for, and it occurred to me that I complain on a fairly regular basis. I don't want to be that person... We all know someone like her, the person who never has anything good to say because she's too busy complaining about the fact that boys are stupid or that gas prices are astronomical or that she'd really rather not go to work... I think I'm becoming that person though. And no one has proverbally slapped me for it yet, but I wouldn't be surprised if it happens soon.
So, even in the midst of my almost-the-end-of-the-semester-semi-depression, I want to remember that I am blessed beyond measure. That I am bought with the blood of Christ, that my Father has, does and always will take care of me, that I have friends who love me even when I foolishly taper off my time with them to spend it with a boy, that my family loves me and wants me to be around, that my tuition is taken care of, that I have a job, that I don't go hungry, that I have the ability to sing, that the sun is shining and I'm not dead. :-)
If you actually read this, bless you. I'm sure you could find something better to do with your time though! :-) Until next time, I do pray that God will bless your life as richly as He has mine.
Soli deo gloria!
~Allison~
So, it's been a while since I've updated this thing. Between being a college student and waiting tables, I don't have a whole lot of extra time on my hands... Even my Facebook usage has dwindled alarmingly...
Life on this side of Christmas break has slowed... I only have one more paper to write for school, and I've read all but one book that I've been assigned to read. Yay me.
Thanksgiving is fast approaching and bringing with it all the festivity of the holiday season. I saw a sign in someones yard the other day. It said, "Happy Turkey Day!" That irked me, as I'm sure it does every believer who knows that the fourth Thursday in November is about so much more than turkey, green bean casserole and pumpkin pie. As I drove past that sign in my frustrated state of mind, I realized that it had been a while since I'd slowed down to ponder everything that I have to be thankful for, and it occurred to me that I complain on a fairly regular basis. I don't want to be that person... We all know someone like her, the person who never has anything good to say because she's too busy complaining about the fact that boys are stupid or that gas prices are astronomical or that she'd really rather not go to work... I think I'm becoming that person though. And no one has proverbally slapped me for it yet, but I wouldn't be surprised if it happens soon.
So, even in the midst of my almost-the-end-of-the-semester-semi-depression, I want to remember that I am blessed beyond measure. That I am bought with the blood of Christ, that my Father has, does and always will take care of me, that I have friends who love me even when I foolishly taper off my time with them to spend it with a boy, that my family loves me and wants me to be around, that my tuition is taken care of, that I have a job, that I don't go hungry, that I have the ability to sing, that the sun is shining and I'm not dead. :-)
If you actually read this, bless you. I'm sure you could find something better to do with your time though! :-) Until next time, I do pray that God will bless your life as richly as He has mine.
Soli deo gloria!
~Allison~
Friday, July 25, 2008
I'm Back
So... it's definitely been more than a week since I last posted... I've been home for almost a week now. I'm sorry I haven't blogged, but I needed time to process things.
The last week of camp at Campbellsville was great. It went by much too quickly. That week, I was placed on Ping-pong duty for rec and that ws fun. Campbellsville U has a really cool thing that they call the Student Activity Center. It's an old gymnasium in a building that has 2 stories. The bball court is on the top floor, and on the bottom floor is a room with 3 pool tables, 2 ping pong tables, 2 air hockey tables and a fooseball table. There is also a TV and several couches in that room. It's just a great place for the students to hang out. Which is exactly what many of the GO TELL campers did.
On the first day of camp it rained. It was absolutely lovely, the kind of rain that I LOVE to sleep during. But it was fun to get out and run around in the rain with the kids. During services, I was assigned to run the jam cam, aka the handheld, which is the camera that gets carried around stage. The cool thing about the jam cam is that you can get some really cool shots with it. The bad thing is that it's kinda heavy and after carrying it around on your shoulder for 30 minutes it starts to feel REALLY heavy. But it was still fun!
One of the campers kinda latched on to a few of us interns and she found me on Facebook when she got home, so she and I have been messaging back and forth and that's been neat.
The coolest thing that happened that week (for me anyway) happened on Friday morning. I woke up on Friday still not knowing how I was going to get to the airport in Louisville. I'd been asking about getting rides for the last 6 weeks and had come up with nothing. When I walked into the room where we had staff meeting each morning, there was a young man who I'd never seen before drinking coffee. Turns out that he had been an intern with GO TELL in 2007 and he and his wife had come down to Campbellsville to help close out the camp. Since he was a GO TELL inern, I knew that he probably went to one of the 7 colleges that partner with GO TELL. I asked him where he went and he said Boyce College. Boyce College is in Louisville. At this point I asked if he and his wife lived in Louisville and he said yes. I asked if I could ride back to Louisville with them and they said I could. Problem solved. God took care of me. Again. Big surprise, huh? :-)
So then it was off to Honduras. What an eye-opening experience. I've never before lived in a place where clean water is something very preciously conseved, where the land is so pretty, but the people don't have the resources to care for it so trash is just thrown here and there, where people hear about what Americans have and do and can only imagine such extravagance.... It was quite an experience. But you know, the coolest thing about Honduras was not the beautiful beaches or the jungle or the fact that I could walk under a tree, bump my head on it's fruit and realize that I'd just hit my head on a mango. The coolest thing about Honduras is that the people who are Christians there are just so excited about Heaven. They are not tied down to this earth by their earthly possessions... going there gave new meaning to the verse, "It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of Heaven," for me.
I was placed on a construction team while in Honduras, and I helped prep a site for the laying of a foundation for a playground. I didn't get to interact with the islanders much while doing this, so I was kinda bummed about that... But I know that God called and provided for me to go on the trip, so I know that He had a purpose in doing so.
So now it's back to real life. Job hunting starts this Saturday (I've been filling in at the SBTC for the last week) and I move into my dorm room next Friday. It's pretty exciting and I still covet your prayers. Thanks for keeping up with me over the summer and thank you so much for praying for me. I cannot express how much I appreciate it. Until next time, God bless!!!
Soli deo gloria,
~Allison~
The last week of camp at Campbellsville was great. It went by much too quickly. That week, I was placed on Ping-pong duty for rec and that ws fun. Campbellsville U has a really cool thing that they call the Student Activity Center. It's an old gymnasium in a building that has 2 stories. The bball court is on the top floor, and on the bottom floor is a room with 3 pool tables, 2 ping pong tables, 2 air hockey tables and a fooseball table. There is also a TV and several couches in that room. It's just a great place for the students to hang out. Which is exactly what many of the GO TELL campers did.
On the first day of camp it rained. It was absolutely lovely, the kind of rain that I LOVE to sleep during. But it was fun to get out and run around in the rain with the kids. During services, I was assigned to run the jam cam, aka the handheld, which is the camera that gets carried around stage. The cool thing about the jam cam is that you can get some really cool shots with it. The bad thing is that it's kinda heavy and after carrying it around on your shoulder for 30 minutes it starts to feel REALLY heavy. But it was still fun!
One of the campers kinda latched on to a few of us interns and she found me on Facebook when she got home, so she and I have been messaging back and forth and that's been neat.
The coolest thing that happened that week (for me anyway) happened on Friday morning. I woke up on Friday still not knowing how I was going to get to the airport in Louisville. I'd been asking about getting rides for the last 6 weeks and had come up with nothing. When I walked into the room where we had staff meeting each morning, there was a young man who I'd never seen before drinking coffee. Turns out that he had been an intern with GO TELL in 2007 and he and his wife had come down to Campbellsville to help close out the camp. Since he was a GO TELL inern, I knew that he probably went to one of the 7 colleges that partner with GO TELL. I asked him where he went and he said Boyce College. Boyce College is in Louisville. At this point I asked if he and his wife lived in Louisville and he said yes. I asked if I could ride back to Louisville with them and they said I could. Problem solved. God took care of me. Again. Big surprise, huh? :-)
So then it was off to Honduras. What an eye-opening experience. I've never before lived in a place where clean water is something very preciously conseved, where the land is so pretty, but the people don't have the resources to care for it so trash is just thrown here and there, where people hear about what Americans have and do and can only imagine such extravagance.... It was quite an experience. But you know, the coolest thing about Honduras was not the beautiful beaches or the jungle or the fact that I could walk under a tree, bump my head on it's fruit and realize that I'd just hit my head on a mango. The coolest thing about Honduras is that the people who are Christians there are just so excited about Heaven. They are not tied down to this earth by their earthly possessions... going there gave new meaning to the verse, "It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of Heaven," for me.
I was placed on a construction team while in Honduras, and I helped prep a site for the laying of a foundation for a playground. I didn't get to interact with the islanders much while doing this, so I was kinda bummed about that... But I know that God called and provided for me to go on the trip, so I know that He had a purpose in doing so.
So now it's back to real life. Job hunting starts this Saturday (I've been filling in at the SBTC for the last week) and I move into my dorm room next Friday. It's pretty exciting and I still covet your prayers. Thanks for keeping up with me over the summer and thank you so much for praying for me. I cannot express how much I appreciate it. Until next time, God bless!!!
Soli deo gloria,
~Allison~
Saturday, July 5, 2008
Saying Goodbye
Today is the day we pack up and head out. Half of the group has already left for Texas, and it saddens me to think that I probably won't see them again. 6 weeks isn't that long in the scheme of things, but when you live with someone and do ministry with them, you bond quickly. And then it's no fun saying goodbye to people you've grown close to.
It seems like it's barely been 2 weeks, let alone 5. We've only got one more week of GO TELL left and then it's off to Honduras for me. I'm excited, but I can hardly believe that the summer is already drawing to a close. It's been a crazy awesome ride.
I'm riding up to KY with Olivia and Jenny and we're leaving in about an hour. The drive is about 6 hours. Please keep us in your prayers if you read this today! :-)
This is probably the last blog I'll post while I'm gone. I don't know if I'll be able to access a computer next week, and I don't know how much time I'll have. My flight back to Texas from Kentucky leaves next Friday. The plane for Honduras leaves Saturday morning and we'll be back on July 19. I'll blog again after I get home.
Thank you for keeping up with me this summer. I appreciate all of the prayers and support!
Oh! If you want to see some pictures from the camps, click here. I'll post some of my own when I get back and can upload photos from my camera.
Love you!!!
~Allison~
It seems like it's barely been 2 weeks, let alone 5. We've only got one more week of GO TELL left and then it's off to Honduras for me. I'm excited, but I can hardly believe that the summer is already drawing to a close. It's been a crazy awesome ride.
I'm riding up to KY with Olivia and Jenny and we're leaving in about an hour. The drive is about 6 hours. Please keep us in your prayers if you read this today! :-)
This is probably the last blog I'll post while I'm gone. I don't know if I'll be able to access a computer next week, and I don't know how much time I'll have. My flight back to Texas from Kentucky leaves next Friday. The plane for Honduras leaves Saturday morning and we'll be back on July 19. I'll blog again after I get home.
Thank you for keeping up with me this summer. I appreciate all of the prayers and support!
Oh! If you want to see some pictures from the camps, click here. I'll post some of my own when I get back and can upload photos from my camera.
Love you!!!
~Allison~
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Hiatus
So, I was reading my best friend's blogand she posted a blog with the ABC's of her. I thought it was cute and wanted to do it too. It's kinda pointless, but I think I kinda needed the goofiness. :-) Enjoy!
The ABC's of Me
A) Age ~ 21, woot!
B) Burger of choice ~ Umm... I'm actually in the mood for a turkey burger at the moment. Mmm.
C) Car ~ 2005 Kia Optima
D) Dog's name ~ I've never had a dog.
E) Essential item you use every day ~ Air
F) Favorite TV show ~ Big Bang Theory, CSI: Miami, HIMYM
G) Favorite Game to play ~ Scrabble & Egyptian Rat Screw, woot!
H) Hometown ~ Fort Worth, TX
I) Instruments I play ~ Toco la guitara. (Which means, "I play the guitar.")
J) Favorite Juice ~ Concord Grape. Yummy!!!
K) Whose whatnots would I love to kick? ~ What's a whatnot?
L) Last restaurant I ate at ~ Piccadilly's (sic)
M) Favorite Muppet ~ Umm.... I think I like Beaker. You know, the skinny one with the red shock of hair.
N) Number of piercings ~ both ears are double-pierced
O) Overnight hospital stays ~ None that I remember. I had one when I was a baby
P) People I was with today ~ GO TELL people
Q) What do I do in my quiet time ~ pray, read my Bible and write
R) Biggest regret ~ I try not to regret things. What's done is done and wasting time wishing I could change it doesn't help.
S) Status ~ Single
T) Time I woke up ~ I think it was 8:15
U) What I consider unique ~ The love of Christ
V) Vegetables I love ~ Spinach, broccoli, potatoes...
W) Worst habit ~ BITING MY NAILS
X) X-rays I have had ~ Teeth and my foot
Y) Yummy food I ate today ~ Umm.... I don't think I've had anything all that yummy today.
Z) Zodiac sign ~ Pisces. But who cares?
Alrighty, that's all for now. Thanks for reading! Please keep praying for me. I love you!!!
The ABC's of Me
A) Age ~ 21, woot!
B) Burger of choice ~ Umm... I'm actually in the mood for a turkey burger at the moment. Mmm.
C) Car ~ 2005 Kia Optima
D) Dog's name ~ I've never had a dog.
E) Essential item you use every day ~ Air
F) Favorite TV show ~ Big Bang Theory, CSI: Miami, HIMYM
G) Favorite Game to play ~ Scrabble & Egyptian Rat Screw, woot!
H) Hometown ~ Fort Worth, TX
I) Instruments I play ~ Toco la guitara. (Which means, "I play the guitar.")
J) Favorite Juice ~ Concord Grape. Yummy!!!
K) Whose whatnots would I love to kick? ~ What's a whatnot?
L) Last restaurant I ate at ~ Piccadilly's (sic)
M) Favorite Muppet ~ Umm.... I think I like Beaker. You know, the skinny one with the red shock of hair.
N) Number of piercings ~ both ears are double-pierced
O) Overnight hospital stays ~ None that I remember. I had one when I was a baby
P) People I was with today ~ GO TELL people
Q) What do I do in my quiet time ~ pray, read my Bible and write
R) Biggest regret ~ I try not to regret things. What's done is done and wasting time wishing I could change it doesn't help.
S) Status ~ Single
T) Time I woke up ~ I think it was 8:15
U) What I consider unique ~ The love of Christ
V) Vegetables I love ~ Spinach, broccoli, potatoes...
W) Worst habit ~ BITING MY NAILS
X) X-rays I have had ~ Teeth and my foot
Y) Yummy food I ate today ~ Umm.... I don't think I've had anything all that yummy today.
Z) Zodiac sign ~ Pisces. But who cares?
Alrighty, that's all for now. Thanks for reading! Please keep praying for me. I love you!!!
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